It’s not every day we get to put a brand-new (well, centuries-old, but freshly upgraded) ride through its paces for our Kiwi readership. Yet here we are, ginger snaps in one hand, mince pie in the other, about to take Santa’s Sleigh for a spin. Talk about a jolly test drive!
From the outside, the sleigh seems a mix of old-school craftsmanship and modern aero styling. It’s got lashings of candy apple red paint (surprise, surprise) with gold trim that would make even the flashiest Auckland boy-racer envious. Not a single door or window in sight—this baby’s fully convertible, with eight-hoof drive powered by top-tier reindeer torque.
Santa’s workshop has apparently partnered with the boffins at Elveson to integrate advanced driver-assist features. Forget your ordinary GPS—this sleigh’s outfitted with a Global Present Positioning System (GPPS), allowing Santa to pinpoint every chimney from Cape Reinga to the Bluff. Adaptive cruise control is standard, although it’s less about roads and more about navigating swirling snow and the odd low-flying tui.
We love the newly installed Reindeer Performance Module (RPM) that tunes each reindeer’s magic output. Think of it like a turbocharger for Dasher and the gang—perfect for those last-minute speeds when a child’s made the ‘Nice’ list with seconds to spare.
Our performance test was unorthodox, to say the least. In zero-degree conditions atop Mt. Ruapehu, we launched the sleigh from stationary to 100kph vertically in a staggering 1.2 seconds. (Thank you, comet-like acceleration!) On a more conventional level, sleigh-handling was surprisingly agile around the twisties near Queenstown—though we must note, cornering on a magical flying vehicle is very different from your run-of-the-mill Subaru.
There’s no suspension in the traditional sense, but Santa’s harness tech with adjustable “hoofy dampers” ensures a velvety ride. The seat is a luscious triple-layer shearling (naturally from ethically-sourced North Pole sheep) that cossets your posterior like a recliner in a posh Auckland cinema.
If you’re in the market for something that defies gravity, delivers presents faster than a speeding ticket on the Desert Road, and comes with more nostalgia than a Kiwiana biscuit tin, Santa’s Sleigh is the ultimate festive chariot. Sure, it’s not street-legal, you can’t exactly park it at the local Countdown, and you’ll have to mind the reindeer droppings. But for pure merry performance, it’s the only ride in town.
Ho ho ho, and happy driving—er, flying—from all of us here at New Zealand Autocar!
